i am married to a christian Eygptian man, and at first things were great, we got married and its all differen?

anyway, i think he only married me for his citizenship at first, but i think he fell in love with me, he works out of town and has a place to stay when he is not home, but he didnt do this until he got his conditons of residency removed, he just left after that, I didnt know what the paper was until I called about it, and it gives him 10 yrs, but not his citizenship, not yet he still needs me, the problem is I love him so much, he is the first man I ever really loved, and I dont understand how he could hurt me like that, I always told him I would be there and help him no matter what but to never lie to me about it, because my heart couldnt take that, not matter what, I want him in my life, and he is a good provider and I wouldnt take his citizenship away from him, he has worked to hard for it, and I know he fell in love with me at some point, but I think he keeps it under control, he is not a romantic man, and we fought alot before he moved, but now that he moved when we do see each other, we dont fight, and we have always had great , he has made me feel things i never thought I could feel, but he also has a bad anger problem, and no matter what happens its my fault and sometimes he calls me the worst names I have ever heard, no one has ever talked to me the way he does. and he never apologizes, the closest he will get is you made me made. But then everything will be ok, for a litte we dont talk but we have allot, and its so good, I think about him all the time, and Im so afraid of getting hurt, and losing him, I just need some advice from a real christian egyptian man and how you act when you are really in love with a woman, I mean do you call her worthless pieace of ****, or b---ch, wh--e, I destroyed his life, then he wiill say he said it out of anferk he calls me selfish, and our whole marriage is based on him and his life, and I have done everything for him, he took over the bills and when we met my credit score was 750 and I had a 2005 ford focus it just got reposed, but all his credit cards are paid and my credit score is 586 now, and they took my car over one 300 dollar pymt he promised to pay, I mean after he got that last paper he just left, and I had to move in w/ my mom for 3 months, and I just recently found a nice home for my daughter and my mother helped me get this place and she does not want me let him know where I live but I miss him and I feel like gods telling me know but my heart is telling me yes let him come and see his new home, but I told him that I wasnt going to let him make fl out of me, I sent him some of these comments about amican woman who marry egyptian men, and if he wants to come his is going to be honest with me or or I will not finish what he started, all I want is the truth, the truth to me is worth more then anything right now, and I can move on with the truth, but not ever really knowing, you just dont do that to any human,, especeially when I feel so deeply in love with him. its not fair for me, I need some help from anone who may have had this happen or is going thru it, mostley from and egyptian man who knows what true love is and how he would really act, please please help me