Read my Common App essay?

Being culturally aware is a very valuable attribute. You will be amazed when you see how diverse a college campus is. Tolerance is missing in this world, but when you are in the university environment, it's like this utopia of acceptance. I like when you mention that your skill of speaking two languages and have acquaintances all over the world “is useful in any profession”. Talk more about how you are going to contribute to the bigger picture…even after you leave with a degree. Mentioning goals and paths to success will strengthen your essay. Colleges want to see their alumni become leaders and advocates of their communities and put forth the knowledge they’ve gained to enrich the fabric of society. You are so on that track! Best of luck to you!